How to Help Someone who has ADHD
Dating Someone With A.D.D. | Her Campus
12 May Whether you have ADHD, or you're the partner of someone who has ADHD, dealing with ADHD relationships is hard. But, these 7 rules can save your life. 27 May Hey y'all, I've just recently started dating someone with ADHD and it's been kind of stressful. There are times where she gets frustrated and takes it out on me, and I know she doesn't intend to do it. There are instances where she'll talk about her feelings and come off as if she's personally attacking me for. 24 Apr Oooh shiny. Attention Deficit Disorder. Multitasking is your super power. You want to get one thing done at a time, its your best intention, its just that everything is so interesting, and you simply can't get to "getting it done." No, I'm not talking about the people who “totally need meds to finish this paper by.
If you are dating someone with ADHD you might already know that life will never be boring. People with ADHD are known for being spontaneous, creative and full of energy.
There are many positive traits that come along with ADHD and these might have been what first attracted you to the other person. But adults with ADHD are also known for being forgetful, disorganized and starting but not finishing tasks.
Some might have a hard time with emotional regulation, becoming excited, frustrated or angry easily. Their inattention might make you feel unimportant.
Dealing with Symptoms Together and Overcoming Relationship Challenges
Despite the potential problems, many people have found that relationships where one partner has ADHD can be successful and happy. If you are in a relationship with someone with ADHD, you might want to remember the following:. Educating yourself about ADHD is important. Look for books and reputable websites to find out what ADHD is and read about the main symptoms. Learn about common strategies and treatments. ADHD symptoms may appear differently in each person.
Once you have learned about the overall symptoms of ADHD, you want to know how these symptoms appear in your partner. ADHD is not an excuse for every problem in your relationship.
It is easy to blame ADHD, or your partner, for problems that come up. But it is important to remember that all relationships, with and without a partner with ADHD, have disagreements, all-out fights and partners sometimes irritate one another. Inattention can show up in many different ways. You might find it hard to keep up with their thoughts. The ADHD brain rarely stops, thoughts can fly through at a hundred miles an hour. You might be having a conversation but your partner might have moved on to several other topics during the course of a few minutes.
Emotional regulation is sometimes a problem for adults with ADHD. You might see emotional outbursts or they might impulsively say something they regret later.
You might find it hard to keep up with their thoughts. Sam shares a comical story about this while at the same time, its frustrating. Share your thoughts and experience below.
Mood disorders, such as anxiety and depression are also commonly associated with ADHD. During times of high emotion your partner might find it more difficult to concentrate or pay attention to a single task.
If your partner is upset, worried, or anxious, you might notice that an already low level of focus becomes even less so. You might find periods of hyperfocus confusing because it seems to be the opposite of ADHD but many people find when involved in a highly interesting task they become hyperfocused on it.
Important dates, events and information can disappear within minutes.
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You want to be supportive without becoming a caretaker. You might find it easy to fall into the role of caregiver, picking up after your partner, helping them stay on track and taking on most of the household chores. This often ends in consistent criticisms and resentment. Instead, help your partner find strategies to manage ADHD symptoms and offer your support and unconditional love.
ADHD symptoms can be managed but not cured. ADHD is a lifelong disorder. However, many people learn to work with their strengths and find strategies to help, such as using reminders, alarms and to-do lists.
Always remember to focus on why you were first attracted to your partner and focus on their strengths.
What Having ADD/ADHD Feels Like
The Experts Speak Out. Eileen Bailey is a freelance health writer. She is the author of What Went Right: She can be found on Twitter eileenmbailey and on Facebook at eileenmbailey.